Thursday, February 4, 2010

Ahh, Sweet February

Wow, how time flies!?! I haven't posted in months. Time just seems to pick up and go and leave us in dust. Things have been a bit different lately. We finally decided to join the high ranks of parenthood...Baby W will be here in September. Exciting. What seemed like an ETERNITY of trying..really wasn't. Only a few months..which is normal I hear. lol. I will never forget seeing the 2 pink lines instantly. I stood there..dead in my tracks and said (pardon me) HOLY SHIT..wooo hoo! ha ha! I was home by myself so i could scream as loud as i want..well even if anyone else would've been home..i still would've screamed. lol! Week 5, 6 & 7 were not so good. Sickness was AWFUL. It was like having the flu without the aches/pains. I was miserable. Week 8 was better, but still sickies off and on. I am on week 9 now..feeling mucho better and sickness has been replaced with blah and tired feeling. :) i'll take that over sick though, any day! I still get the inevitable dry heaves in the morning though..that rocks. :( It only lasts a few very short minutes and i don't complain. It comes on fast and leaves that fast too! Thank goodness!

We went to colorado on Vacation a few weeks ago...aka..during the worst sickie weeks i had. YAY..what a great way to spend vacation. We talked about coming home early..but i stuck it out! It was amazing out there..beautiful, peaceful and just serene. I loved it!

I seem to be emotional easy lately..not a big fan of that. I usually cry once a day. Maybe it is theraputic. 99% of the time, it is due to having a question for my mom that I will never be able to ask and then i get all now and just really really really really miss her. I try to be strong, but it just seems useless lately. I never thought i would have to go through pregnancy or labor with out her and it honestly terrifies me. The other day i realized what scared me the matter what, she was the one person in life that I could count on forever to love me no matter what. Now, not saying that Troy doesn' god forbid if for some god forsaken reason our marriage would end..i wouldn't have the person to love me no matter what. Her love knew no boundries and was unconditional. I miss that and realize it till she was gone. I feel like i took her for granted. Anyway..i could go on and on..but i must stop. :)

i feel a bit better just typing this out..seems to have gotten a bit out of my system...g'night.